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You have stories to tell, and passions to share, and things to talk about that are more interesting than the weather.

Match.com’s 2014 Year in Review report revealed that 5,500 users said “Frozen” was their favorite movie that year, by far beating out hundreds of other titles.

This is the hardest one to pull off, but it can work if you do it right.

Some have a broad membership base of diverse users looking for many different types of relationships.

Other sites target highly specific demographics based on features like shared interests, location, religion, or relationship type.

Studies shows that people like people who are similar to them. If she’s philosophical, try your best to be philosophical as well.

Use what you’ve learned from her profile to determine what you’re going to say and how you’re going to say it. If she’s a nerdy hipster, you could give the example to the right a shot. Women like being complimented when it’s done correctly, so don’t go for the obvious “you’re hot/sexy/cute/beautiful/gorgeous”.

That same Ok Cupid study discovered that “favorite movies”, “vegetarian”, and even “zombie” are some of the most effective words to use, and the best phrases to use with these words are “you mention”, “good taste”, and “noticed that”.

A study by Sidekick says the perfect subject line is unique to the recipient and contains 30 characters or less, just to name a few suggestions.

Same goes for the entire message in general — keep it short! If you want to be the most boring, unoriginal person who has ever reached out to this woman, then simply say “Hi, how are you?

If fact, an article on the Soulmates blog said your chances will increase tenfold. Their research shows men who use words like “sorry”, “apologize”, and “awkward” in their messages have more success.

If you don’t end on a question, or ask at least one question during your entire message, why would she take the energy to reply? If you aren’t a wordsmith or Will Ferrell, just say so instead of trying to force it. While it’s hard to guarantee that all of these tips will work 100% of the time, they’re definitely a good place to start.

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